Stacey Returns to a Dungeon

Participating in kink is therapeutic for me, and going to the dungeon is group therapy. Let’s be honest, those of us who are actively involved in kink need therapy. No sane or stable person would desire the things I want done to me or said about me. That's ok though, I am accepting who I am, what I like, and what I want.

Anyways, it’s been 8 months since I last went to my local dungeon, and I needed it. Of course, nothing went exactly as planned, but going with the flow is what I do best: I still had a fun time. I got the release I needed. I had deep and insightful conversations. I left a lighter and happier person! 

My first time back actually started a few days before the play party. There is a switch who attended who was interested in emotional and mental sadism, humiliation, and degradation. All things I am extremely interested in! I was anxious, but with Mistress Jackie's encouragement, I approached them, and to my surprise, they were open to talking about a scene. We discussed things we enjoyed, such as soft limits, hard limits, and aftercare needs. Found what we had in common and went from there. In the end, we negotiated an incredibly fun scene with foot worship, dirty worn socks, and sucking on dildos while my butt plug remote was passed around. To say I was excited is an understatement.

However, the night before the play party I got a message from them. Their partner and handler, who is new to kink, was not comfortable with them sceneing with other people yet. I went from excited to disappointed but respected their boundaries. I told them I look forward to seeing them tomorrow and meeting their partner.

Instead of a Femdom/degradation scene I prepared myself for some much-needed little time. When I regress, it's back to age 4 or early preschool. So, I packed my diaper, onesie, sippy cup, and coloring supplies. Once I got there, I quickly changed into my diaper and clothes and put my hair in pigtails. I then waddled my way back to the main room, dumped all my crayons out on the bed, and started to color. I fist-grabbed the crayons and started working on my masterpiece: farting kittens (hehehe).

My time that evening was spent drinking water from my sippy cup and coloring.... Talking to friends as a child and giving up all adult cares or pretenses was so freeing. The light in my eyes came back, my cheeks hurt from smiling. I missed feeling that way and I look forward to it again. I could only do so much coloring though and there were new people to meet.

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Later in the evening I went out on the back porch and visited with some friends. We chatted and then the conversation became deep, as they often do. One friend mentioned she didn't feel comfortable participating in a submissive roundtable group because she is not in a dynamic. This led to a lengthy conversation about self-esteem, being worthy, not needing a dynamic to validate our feelings and experiences. I hope others left the conversation feeling as uplifted as I did.

By this point, the evening was winding down and my chariot was going to turn into a pumpkin, I changed out of my onesie, undid my pigtails, put back on my big people's clothes, and disposed of my diaper. Said my goodbyes and headed home.